In today's demanding world, parenting has transformed into a high-pressure journey filled with chaos and overwhelming expectations. Most Indian parents genuinely want the best for their children, but this well-intentioned desire often crosses into territory where love becomes control and guidance turns into silent suffocation.
The Parenting Pressure Cooker
Modern parents frequently push their children, insist on specific paths, and meticulously plan futures, all while believing they're acting in their child's best interest. What many fail to recognize is that this relentless drive to create a "perfect" life often overlooks a fundamental truth: happiness cannot be forced, and dreams cannot be borrowed from parental aspirations.
This crucial message forms the core of educationist and motivational speaker Vikas Divyakirti's refreshing parenting philosophy that's currently taking social media by storm. His candid reflections offer an almost old-school yet profoundly powerful approach to raising children in contemporary India.
The Happiness Pyramid: A Revolutionary Approach
Divyakirti reveals that he has constructed a unique "pyramid" of priorities for his child, where happiness occupies the top position, while academic and professional achievements find their place much lower in the hierarchy.
"I am very clear about one thing — I always tell my child that the first thing I want is for you to be happy. Everything else is secondary," Divyakirti explains in his viral video. "If other achievements happen along the way, great; if not, it doesn't matter. Your happiness matters most to me."
This philosophy represents a significant departure from the achievement-oriented parenting common in many Indian households today. According to Divyakirti, authentic parenting isn't about imposing choices but involves patiently guiding, thoroughly explaining, and trusting a child's capacity to understand complex decisions.
Gentle Guidance Versus Forced Ambitions
Divyakirti elaborates on how genuine happiness manifests in a child's life. "Happiness will come from not forcing my wishes onto him. I will explain, I will wait patiently," he states. "If I feel he is going down the wrong path, I will tell him gently, 'Son, this is not the right way,' and I will give reasons, describe things, and guide him toward the right direction."
The educationist firmly believes that children respond positively to logical explanations delivered with love and patience. "Why wouldn't a child understand if we explain with love?" he questions, highlighting the importance of communication over commands.
He contrasts this approach with the damaging consequences of imposing parental ambitions. "But if I stubbornly impose my ambitions on him—tell him, 'You have to do this career,' or 'You must marry this person,' or 'You must live life in this exact way'—then what's the result? I know many people who are extremely successful, yet they hate their parents, especially their fathers."
This observation strikes at the heart of a widespread issue in Indian parenting culture, where professional success often comes at the cost of broken family relationships.
Rebuilding Bonds Versus Building Careers
Divyakirti's perspective carries particular weight because it comes from an educationist who understands both academic excellence and human psychology. His message emphasizes that while careers can be rebuilt and success can be delayed, damaged parent-child relationships are incredibly difficult to repair once broken.
His words resonate deeply with parents who traditionally measure their love and involvement through control and direction. The viral response to his video suggests that many Indian parents are ready to reconsider what truly matters in their children's development and well-being.
As parenting paradigms evolve in India, Divyakirti's happiness-first approach offers a compassionate alternative to the high-pressure methods that have dominated for generations. It serves as a timely reminder that successful parenting might have less to do with creating high-achievers and more to do with nurturing well-adjusted, content human beings.