A significant social shift is unfolding in the coastal city of Mangaluru, where young men from the Konkani-speaking Catholic community are increasingly looking beyond their traditional circles to find life partners. Faced with a shortage of suitable matches locally, many are now turning to districts in north Karnataka and the Malnad region to secure marriages.
Educational Divide Drives Search Beyond Borders
The primary catalyst for this trend is a stark educational and occupational mismatch within the local community. Religious leaders and families note that many Konkani Catholic young men have lower educational qualifications, with some not having completed their matriculation. In contrast, prospective brides within the same community are often highly educated, holding undergraduate degrees or higher. This gap makes it difficult for men who are less educated or not employed in white-collar professions to find acceptance.
Fr Vijay Victor Lobo, parish priest of St Anthony's Church in Kuloor, confirms this observation. He points out that even youths with ITI diplomas face challenges, while girls typically have a minimum of a graduate degree. This disparity has forced families to expand their search geographically.
Personal Stories Highlight a Growing Pattern
The trend is not just a statistic; it is reflected in numerous personal stories. Stalin D'Souza, a driver from Kulashekar, is one example. After crossing 30 and facing repeated rejections locally due to his qualifications and job, he followed his sister's suggestion to explore alliances from the Ballari Diocese. He married nine years ago and now has a child. However, he acknowledges the adjustment required, citing significant differences in food, culture, and traditions between coastal and inland households.
Brandon D'Souza, who married a woman from Hassan, and several of his friends who found partners from places like Hassan and Raichur, echo this experience. Their stories underscore a community adapting to new realities.
Church Data Confirms the Rising Trend
Religious authorities have taken note of this increasing pattern. Rev Fr Alwyn Richard D'Souza, director of the Family Life Service Centre under the Diocese of Mangalore, provides concrete numbers. He states that close to 2,000 weddings are solemnized under the diocese annually. As part of the mandatory marriage preparation courses—22 of which are held each year—he regularly encounters couples where the bride is from other districts.
Fr D'Souza estimates that at least 50 such marriages take place every year, a number that has been growing over time. This formal recognition from the diocese solidifies the trend as a measurable demographic change within the Mangaluru Catholic community.
The search for brides has thus extended to districts like north Karnataka, Hassan, Shivamogga, and Chikkamagaluru. This movement, driven by socio-economic factors, is gradually reshaping family dynamics and cultural integration within the wider Christian community in Karnataka.
