A Parent's Guide for Contemporary India: Addressing Critical Gaps in Child Development
On January 18, 2026, media reports surfaced detailing a profoundly disturbing incident from Bhajanpura in northeast Delhi. According to these accounts, a six-year-old child was allegedly sexually assaulted by three boys aged between ten and thirteen years old. As this story spread across news platforms and social media channels, it ignited a familiar yet troubling public response—widespread anxiety about adolescent behavior patterns and deeply anguished questions about societal direction.
The Immediate Aftermath: Parental Concerns Surface
That very day, my phone began ringing repeatedly with concerned calls from distressed parents. "Doctor, what is happening to children these days?" one parent asked with palpable worry. Another wondered, "Is social media primarily to blame for these behavioral shifts? Are we introducing sex education concepts too early in their development?" A third parent posed a quieter, more introspective question: "Have we failed somewhere as caregivers and educators?"
As a psychiatrist specializing in child and adolescent mental health, I find these questions completely understandable—yet fundamentally incomplete. Such traumatic incidents do not necessarily indicate that children are becoming inherently more violent or morally compromised. Instead, they highlight a dangerous and widening gap between early exposure to sexual content and the absence of proper guidance and interpretation.
The Reality of Information Overload
Contemporary children are not growing up in an information vacuum regarding sexual matters. Quite the opposite—they are inundated with excessive information arriving prematurely, without appropriate context or responsible interpretation. When parents hesitate or maintain silence on these crucial topics, children inevitably turn to alternative sources for answers: pornography platforms, social media networks, peer conversations, and popular culture representations. Unfortunately, none of these sources typically teach essential concepts like consent, empathy, or consequence awareness.
In my clinical practice, I frequently encounter parents who express sentiments like, "Doctor, we assumed the school system would provide this education," or "We worried that initiating these conversations might make situations worse." What actually exacerbates these situations is leaving children to navigate complex questions alone—questions they are already asking—which then get answered by the least reliable sources available: peers and unregulated digital platforms.
Adolescence: Navigating Curiosity Without Direction
Indian family structures have traditionally relied on unspoken boundaries and implicit understandings. Many parents tell me, sometimes defensively, "We never had these explicit conversations during our childhood, and we turned out perfectly fine." This perspective might have held validity in a different era, but it no longer applies in our current digital age where smartphones can instantly answer questions that parents might be consciously or unconsciously avoiding.
Adolescence represents a developmental phase marked by heightened curiosity, emotional intensity, and increased sensitivity to peer approval. Simultaneously, the neurological systems responsible for impulse control and long-term judgment remain under development. This natural imbalance constitutes a normal aspect of human growth rather than an indicator of poor character.
Without proper guidance, adolescent curiosity often finds fulfillment through dangerous pathways. Young individuals might misinterpret persistence as romantic devotion, feel entitled to attention from others, or believe that rejection represents something to be challenged rather than respected. The cinematic narratives we've grown up watching often reinforce these problematic beliefs. I have personally counseled teenagers who expressed genuine confusion about why their behavior frightened someone else—simply because nobody had explained the crucial distinction between healthy interest and intrusive behavior.
Parents regularly ask me, "Why don't they understand basic limits and boundaries?" My response typically remains straightforward: limits that are never explicitly explained cannot be reasonably understood or internalized.
The Significant Cost of Delayed Conversations
Many parents wait indefinitely for that perfectly "appropriate" moment to initiate difficult conversations. In reality, these optimal moments often pass unnoticed while children continue seeking answers elsewhere.
I have clinically observed eleven-year-olds experiencing significant distress about normal bodily changes simply because no adult had explained these natural developmental processes. I have met adolescents who firmly believed biological myths gathered from friends or online content because nobody had provided factual corrections. By the time parents recognize their child's exposure to inappropriate information, they often feel it has become "too late" to intervene effectively.
It is rarely genuinely too late for constructive intervention. However, it is frequently much later than parents initially realize, making the guidance process more challenging.
Consent, Rejection, and Digital World Complexities
By early adolescence, conversations about relationships and boundaries need to become clearer and more direct. This developmental stage often causes maximum parental discomfort—leading many to withdraw precisely when engagement is most crucial.
A father once asked me, "Doctor, how can I explain consent concepts to my son without inadvertently encouraging premature sexual interest?" A mother inquired, "If I discuss rejection openly, won't it damage her self-confidence?" These represent genuine parental fears. However, avoiding these essential topics does not protect children; it merely leaves them unprepared for real-world interactions.
I recall counseling a fourteen-year-old boy who insisted he was "only expressing love" by repeatedly messaging a classmate who had explicitly asked him to stop. His parents expressed shock when school authorities intervened. Nobody had ever explained to him that affection without permission can transform into intimidation. Their favorite Bollywood hero exhibited similar behavior and ultimately won the girl's affection—creating a narrative where ends justify means, whereas in reality this constitutes harassment.
The digital environment complicates these dynamics further. Images get shared impulsively, messages forwarded without thoughtful consideration, and boundaries crossed without physical presence. Many adolescents fail to comprehend that online actions carry significant emotional and legal consequences. Parents often ask me, "But it was just on the phone—how serious could it possibly be?" Serious enough to potentially follow children into adulthood and establish disturbing behavioral patterns.
Incorporating LGBTQ Conversations
This often becomes the conversation point where parents lower their voices and express additional concerns.
"Doctor, my son says he feels confused about his emotional attractions—is this merely a developmental phase?"
"My daughter says she doesn't identify with traditional feminine expectations—should I discourage these thoughts?"
"If we discuss these topics openly, won't we implant ideas into their developing minds?"
These questions do not indicate poor parenting. They represent parents attempting to navigate unfamiliar territory without adequate maps or guidance.
Children and adolescents may naturally question attraction patterns, personal identity, or gender expectations at various developmental stages. For some individuals, these feelings remain transient; for others, they persist into adulthood. Parents need not rush toward labeling, diagnosing, or panicking. What proves most helpful is maintaining calm, non-reactive responses that keep communication channels open.
I frequently remind parents that silence creates far more confusion than respectful acknowledgement. When children feel they cannot ask questions within their home environment, they inevitably search for answers elsewhere—and those external answers are rarely kind, accurate, or developmentally appropriate.
Importantly, discussions about consent, boundaries, safety, and respect apply universally regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Parents sometimes ask me, "Is this even relevant to our specific family situation?" My answer remains consistently affirmative—because human dignity and social responsibility represent universal values transcending individual differences.
Why Avoidance Strategies Ultimately Backfire
In clinical practice, adolescents who cross sexual boundaries often describe remarkably similar backgrounds: absence of open conversations at home, understanding relationships primarily through cinematic and digital content, equating persistence with masculinity, and experiencing rejection as personal humiliation rather than something to be accepted gracefully.
Indian cultural traditions place significant emphasis on sanskar—encompassing respect, restraint, and responsibility. These values no longer get absorbed automatically through cultural osmosis. They require explicit explanation, thoughtful repetition, and contextual understanding.
Avoiding difficult conversations under the guise of cultural preservation does not actually safeguard traditional values. It leaves those values untransmitted to the next generation.
Common Parental Questions and Professional Responses
Parents frequently ask whether discussing sexuality will make children curious too early, rebellious, or behaviorally reckless. I typically respond with a counter-question: "Do you genuinely believe they aren't already curious?"
Children will inevitably learn about sexual matters. The real choice parents face is determining whether this learning occurs through silence and secrecy or through guidance grounded in empathy, clear boundaries, and personal accountability.
Concluding Reflections
The Bhajanpura incident shocked collective consciousness precisely because it involved children harming another child. That profound discomfort should propel us toward meaningful reflection rather than defensive denial.
Comprehensive sex education does not remove childhood innocence. Strategic silence removes essential protection.
In contemporary India, where exposure begins increasingly early and guidance often arrives dangerously late, parents must reclaim their fundamental role—not as authoritarian lecturers, but as attentive listeners, clear explainers, and steady developmental guides.
The central question is no longer whether children will learn about sexuality. The critical question has become whether they will learn responsibly—from those who care most deeply about their wellbeing and development.
About the Author
Dr. Himanshu Sareen serves as Professor and Head of the Department of Psychiatry at PIMS Medical College and Hospital in Jalandhar, while also maintaining a consultant psychiatrist practice at Sareen Health Care Centre in Jalandhar. With extensive academic credentials and substantial real-world clinical experience, he has authored multiple publications in indexed national and international journals and contributed to professional book chapters. Dr. Sareen remains actively engaged in undergraduate and postgraduate medical education while strengthening structured psychiatric training programs. His core professional interests encompass Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, De-addiction methodologies, and Behavioral Addictions, with strong emphasis on evidence-based practice, public mental health awareness initiatives, and translating research findings into everyday clinical care applications.
